I've been begging and praying for changes in my life for quite sometime now. At the beginning I wasn't ready for the answer to be yes. God had to let me know what I was really asking first, so that I would fully understand what would take place.
Over the course of the following years He's been revealing just that. It's been a ride! An amazing ride. With every step I have felt more and more at peace with my past. There was so much I didn't remember, so much I didn't understand.
Now I know where I come from. I know the causes of all my virtues and flaws alike. I understand why I am the way I am and how not to become what I fear.
So here I stand, at the threshold of my future. All the preparations have been made for me to get what I've always wanted. The pieces are all laid out, waiting for me. I'd given up hope so many times in the past. I'd lowered my standards and deemed myself unworthy of my requests. But now, at the end of it all, I have the potential to get all that I asked for. All that I desired. All that I wept for, and more.
Is it strange that now that it looks like I'll get it all, I hesitate? I'm nervous. I'm not afraid, just nervous. Has my time really come? Will my answer really be yes? Finally? And if so, what comes next?